Isaiah 43: 18-19

"Do not call to mind the former things, or ponder things of the past. Behold, I will do something new. Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert. "

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Contentment

Ok this is going to be a really honest post. Well, all my posts are honest, but you know what I mean. I struggle with contentment. I think most people do to an extent, living in the US and all, but I just really wish I didn't struggle with it so much! God has given us the most beautiful daughter, and now I am on to the next thing we don't have: a house. Its embarrassing to admit, but its true.

We are renting a house, and it suits our needs alright, but most of my friends have either bought or built a house recently, and I'll admit that I have at times been jealous. We dont own a house for several reasons. 1) we had a choice last year: either adopt or buy a house. (I think that was a no-brainer!) 2) Now that we have adopted and started a family, we have to really think about buying a house because we don't want to commit long-term to Charleston if we know we eventually want to move a little closer to home. So for now we continue renting. Our house is not bad, its way better then living in an apartment, but it has some structural flaws that make us nervous about being here long-term. It works just fine with one child, but eventually when we expand our family, we will need something bigger. We have been having issues with mold, and so the stuff in the storage area (where we think the mold is) somewhat had to be moved into the house. We have really tiny closests and I have found myself getting really frustrated. We don't have a ton of stuff, just the normal Christmas decorations, winter clothes, etc in the storage area. Our "master" closet is actually in our little bathroom, which makes it hard to get ready in the morning.

Recently God gave me a reality check. You've heard "God speaks in mysterious ways" but sometimes He really does! and this time, it was through a TV show. Dan and I enjoy watching HGTV, especially the property shows. We were watching House Hunters the other night. The couple on the show came from the projects, got married, had 3 kids and started a business. Well, this business became really successful, and they became millionaires. On the show, they were looking for houses in the $1.5 million range in Orange County, CA.  These houses breathtakingly beautiful. But every single house the couple had an issue with. "The master is too big" or "the master is too small" or "it needs alot of work" and by work, they meant that they didnt like a particular feature such as the color of granite etc. Watching this show, I was sickened by how these people were acting, especially with where they came from. It made me really wonder' "Will it ever be enough?" When will we stop wanting more and more?



Then I thought about the countries I have been to on missions trips, and articles I have read in magazines like Voice of the Martyrs. Entire families living in one-room shacks with dirt for carpet and plywood or sticks for walls. I was so ashamed of my discontentment.

Haiti

India


The US


A House destroyed by Katrina



I am so thankful that God gives us his word to remind us of such simpful truths!

Matthew 6:19 -21 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

 I was talking to someone at work about Beyonce, and although I admire her music, I was shaking my head at her lifestyle. She recently wore a pair of $100,000 jeans. Seriously? So many people across the world can be blessed with that much money. This co-worker told me, "my mom always said, you never see a U-Haul behind a hearse!!" Funny, but also very true. 

Every good and perfect gift is from above. God has given us everything we have, and he can just as easily take it away. You, know we may not live in an amazing house, but it is a house. We have running water and can take hot showers 3x a day if we want to! We can put food on the table every day, and we aren't worrying about where our next paycheck will come from. We are able to provide for our daughter, and buy her the diapers and formula she needs. We can even provide for our dogs.  Our pastor Greg Suratt at Seacoast mentioned tithing today, and how when his children were younger he taught them the simple biblical truth about tithing. I admit Dan and I sometimes forget to tithe, but we know it is SO important, because everything we have is from the Lord, and its all we can do to give back a mere 10%.

So what God has also been trying to tell me is "Stop worrying! Don't you know I will provide for you if you trust me?" One of my favorite verses and and amazing reminder, also from Matthew 6.

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Thanks for reading my lengthy post!!

Contentment

I struggle with contentment. Pretty much on a regular basis. We live in a 3 bedroom, 2 bath house. We don't own our house, for a variety of reasons. A couple of years ago we weren't really ready to buy a house. Then when we finally had enough money saved, we found out we couldn't have biological children, the money went to our adoption. So

Friday, January 20, 2012

the working mama

It's been a few weeks since my last post. Several reasons can account for this. First, I started back at work. My first shift was actually New Years Eve. Second, our main computer crashed (thankfully we backed it up!) and blogging on the ipad is kind of annoying because it tries to auto correct everything and the keyboard isn't very user friendly since its virtual. So, today is the day for amazing thoughts and reflections from Olivia. Ok not really, but I do want to update you on our life with Mia (and maybe just a few thoughts!)

How do I feel about going back to work? Did I cry? Was I so sad to leave Mia the first time? Do I think about her the whole time I'm there? These are some of the questions I've been getting, so I'll answer them one at a time :). It feels great to go back to work. Although its an incredibly exhausting and demanding job, I couldn't wait to get back. I seriously applaud stay-at-home moms because I don't know if I could do it. I was getting a serious case of cabin fever by the end of maternity leave. Plus I missed my work friends and having adult interaction and using my brain in ways other then figuring out how much formula to add to the water in a bottle is so refreshing. Again, I am not belittling stay-at-home moms. I think you guys are amazing. I've just never really been the homemaker type, (cooking and laundry arent my best assets) and I've always liked working. It definitely helps that I only work 3-12 hour shifts a week. Its a long day, but coming home to a beautiful giggling baby is so worth it.

 I didn't cry when I went back to work, and I wasn't really sad. This may sound callous, but since she's at home with Daddy, I know that shes perfectly content and in her comfort zone, so it makes me feel good about leaving her. I think it would be a ton harder if she was getting dropped off at daycare. Do I think about her while I'm at work? Of course, but only here and there because frankly we have been so insanely busy, I'm lucky if I get to go to the bathroom, let alone eat lunch.

For those of you who are new to the blog, I am a labor and delivery nurse, and I came back just in time to start my charge rotation. There are many ups and downs to that, and overall I don't mind it but certain issues make it sometimes difficult to do my job. Thankfully, I absolutely love the girls I work with, and really sometimes we only make it through the day because of eachother.

So how is my baby girl? absolutely amazingly wonderful! She has changed so much in the past month, her little personality is really developing. Every morning she wakes up talking to herself-making the cutest noises. I just love it! When I come to her crib and peek in on her, she gets this huge smile on her face and starts giggling. That smile is worth every heartache, every disappoint on the road to now. Mia has really connected with us. We went to my friend Katie's baby shower, and Mia could not take her eyes off of Dan. It was so cute! No matter where he was, she just followed him with her eyes all over the room. She's such a happy happy girl, and SO much fun to be around. I think shes going to have a pretty chill personality. Every once in a while, she breaks out into hysterical crying, but usually its because shes really tired or really hungry. Its pretty funny actually because she will go from just hanging out with us to sobbing in seconds. She also talks to her toys hanging from her swing. It sounds like she's having full conversations with them. Every time I try to video her, she stops and just stares at the camera. How does she know? Well, I finally snapped a shot with my phone of her smiling when she wasn't paying attention.



She will be four months next Thursday, I cant believe it! Time is flying and we are enjoying every second. Sometimes when she wakes up super early, like 530-6am, I feed her, and then bring her into bed with me and we snuggle and sleep together. She cuddles her little head right up next to mine.

The other day I went to Target with Mia to pick up some baby stuff, and had a mini-revelation. I looked around and saw all kinds of moms with shopping carts topped with infant carriers, and I was so humbled and THANKFUL. So thankful that I was one of those moms! Sometimes it doesnt seem real, but in that moment, I realized just how far God has taken us. I remember vividly walking past the baby section and forcing myself to look away, wondering if I'll ever get to shop in those aisles. Many things in life we take for granted, but shopping in the baby section at Target is something that I definitely do not! It really is the little things in life.

Thanks for following my blog!



Monday, January 2, 2012

My List of "Must Haves" for a Newborn

So, many of my friends are having babies.  I thought I'd ring in the New Year with a list of the things I was soo grateful to have when Mia was first born. Having a new baby is amazing and wonderful, but can also be stressful! This is just a fun list of things, and they aren't in any particular order. Enjoy!

#1:  BOPPY PILLOW!
 I absolutely love this thing. Its a cuddly perfectly shaped "pillow" to support your baby when you need to set her down for a few minutes and want her to stay safe. They say not to let babies sleep in them, but Mia falls asleep in hers all the time.


 
#2 : BURP CLOTHES
These are a must have, especially if you are bottle-feeding, supplementing or pumping. My baby is especially drooly, and we dont feed her without a burp cloth. They are amazing
#3: BOTTLE WARMER
A real time-saver. Since microwaving bottles is not recommended, it can take forever to heat up your bottle in hot water. The bottle warmer is so easy and quick, we even take it with us when we travel!


#4: SWADDLE WRAP
Babies love to be swaddled. Swaddle blankets are great,but if you have a mover and wiggler like I do, she(or he!) will soon be breaking out of her blankets and then waking herself up because she's not swaddled.  The swaddler is great because it has velco so they are nice and snug and cant really get out of it. Mia started sleeping better as soon as we got one (thanks Sonja!)

#5: SOOTHIE PACIFIER
Other pacifiers just don't cut it. These are actually the ones we give to parents in the hospital, but they really are the best. If Mia is fussy for any reason, we give her the pacy and she couldnt be happier! The only downside is that you cant attach them to a pacifier clip, but hey, for a happy baby, its worth the trade off! It even helps her fall asleep at night which is wonderful. I like that you can put your finger inside of it so she can get a good suck on the pacifier.



#6 NETFLIX!
Netflix you wonder? Yes! It is an absolute must-have in my opinion. There are so many times that I watched it while feeding Mia just so I wouldn't fall asleep during feedings! It can really help get you through those first sleepless weeks when you are too exhausted to do much of anything else.


#7 DIAPER GENIE AND CHANGING TABLE
I combined these two because I had a picture of both of them together :) Not everyone claims to need a diaper genie, but it our house, its a must have. Our dogs love anything that smells disgusting, so diaper genie is the perfect way to hide stinky diapers. And its just plain convenient. There are many forms of changing tables, and its just so helpful to have a nice soft, clean place to set your baby down to change him/her. I love having bins underneath to easily grab diapers and other essentials.


#8 BABY SWING
Mia loves her swing. She loves the motion, the little toys hanging down and the music. She recently started talking to the toys which is adorable. Its such a great place to set her when I need to get stuff down around the house. She is happy in there for a long time and will usually eventually fall asleep!

#9 A GOOD BOTTLE OF WINE
Of course, I'm not breastfeeding so its a little easier for me to claim this as a must have. Sometimes after hours and hours of crying, there is nothing like a good glass of wine! For you breastfeeding moms out there, you can have a glass after you baby goes to bed for the night; or if shes still getting up to eat, theres always the good ole "pump and dump" method ;)

#10: INFANT TUB
Having a tub that is safe for a young baby is a must have. I love Mia's tub. My sister and I found it at Target on clearance. It has a mesh portion for her to lay in so that her head is supported and above water. It makes bathtime so easy! Remember, never leave your baby unattended!

#11 INFANT CARRIER
When you want to bring your baby with you, but don't want to pack a stroller or lug around a carseat, an infant carrier is the way to go. Now, I have a Target version of the Baby Bjorn, and I'm not completely happy. It hurts my shoulders after a while. I'm thinking of getting a Moby wrap. But I do overall love having something to carry Mia around in.  I love having her close to me!

#12: Instant Hand Sanitizer!
To conclude my list of must haves, I am a huge fan of instant-hand sanitizer. As a nurse, I'm pretty much obsessed with hand washing. I have a pump by Mia's changing table, and I use it constantly. Anyhow, you can never have too much around the house! But, if you get anything on your hands (poop, etc) you should always wash with soap and water.


Well, I hope you have enjoyed this fun little list, and I wish you a very happy New Years!!